When the family first found out about Lori's tumor before we could allow the fear to set in, I think we were all praying the "it's probably nothing" prayer. But as each appointment was made and discoveries were revealed that "nothing" became a distant dream. The cancer is very real and is growing inside Lori. It is making her short of breath, and tired and scared. I always knew I was her younger sister, but it has been a long time since I felt like her LITTLE sister. Right now, I feel just that..little and helpless.
This week was filled with recovering from her bigger biopsy, PET scans, bone marrow procedures and staging her cancer. This week will end in her first round of chemo and a weekend of anticipation as to how she will handle it.
On Monday she spent a day with Tim shopping for a wig. Strangely romantic in my eyes. I feel like it may be his way of saying "we will get through this and I think you are beautiful no matter what".
It will be my turn to visit on Sunday and be there on Monday to chauffeur the kids to school and back. I have been practicing the fine art of swallowing the lump in my throat and pushing it way down to the pit of my stomach so that I can be brave...brave like her. But sometimes it is just easier to make a b line to the bathroom and keep Visine in my pocket.
No comments:
Post a Comment